Our advice for newlywed couples

Gilbert and Dr. Elizabeth Kiracho have been married for 23 years. Elizabeth advises couples to put God first in everything they do, adding that pleasing God will bring the right values ​​that will keep couples in a strong marriage. “Show your love for your spouse in tangible ways, find out what your spouse likes and do it,” she says, explaining that the five love languages ​​can help provide guidance.

“People feel loved in different ways, through quality time, gifts, words of affirmation, acts of service and physical touch,” she shares. Elizabeth says sex is important to men, so wives shouldn’t deny their husbands marital rights.

“Women, on the other hand, prefer actions that show you love them,” she notes, urging couples to work hard to earn a steady income.

“The lack of adequate financial resources puts a huge strain on marriages,” Elizabeth explains. She adds that it’s important to recognize that hurting each other is inevitable. “Be willing to forgive and bury the past,” she notes.

Gilbert says your spouse should be your best friend. “Your spouse should be the first to know about everything that’s going on with you,” she explains. She says communication is essential in any marriage. “Make sure you’re communicating with your spouse about your thoughts and feelings, don’t be silent,” she urges, adding that you should share your plans for everything, including buying real estate.

“Don’t plan alone if you’re already a couple. If possible, register the property you’ve purchased in both your names as a couple,” he explains.

Daniel and Patricia Rutiba

Daniel and Patricia have been married for 23 years. Daniel says respect is an important quality a man values. “A wife should treat her husband in a way that he doesn’t feel belittled or undermined. A lot of people might talk about submission, but men don’t necessarily want their idea to prevail at all costs,” he says.

She explains that men are open to exchanging views, but they highly value a spouse who respects them and will not publicly embarrass or reprimand them.

“A man who is respected by his wife will find it easy to love her, take care of her needs, and protect her. It is extremely important for a wife to have the emotional intelligence to give her husband the respect he needs,” explains Daniel.

Patricia’s husband says that when a man makes a mistake, he will be willing to listen to his wife if she respectfully offers him an alternative.

“It requires a lot of patience because in a given situation the wife may think faster than the husband, but for a stable marriage it is very important that they work together,” he explains.

Daniel explains that marriage is about building a foundation through good habits, such as planning. “It’s important for a husband and wife to consciously move in the same direction, otherwise there will be conflict and little or no financial progress in the marriage,” he notes. Patricia says that a wife who is truly loved feels safe and is more likely to respect and submit to her husband. “A home should be an oasis of love, understanding and peace, so that every day the family looks forward to coming home as soon as possible,” she adds.

She explains that love is a choice, not a matter of feelings. So every day, a spouse chooses to love their spouse, to be kind, considerate, and generous to them and other family members. “People are so nice to each other at work, but they can come home and treat family members differently and then be surprised when they react negatively. What you give is what you get, Patricia explains. Patricia says that submission doesn’t mean falling on your face before someone; it means respecting your spouse and respecting the office that God has placed in the home to maintain order and peace.

Adubango Brand and Eunice Adubango have been married for 18 years. Brand says it’s important to talk freely and express yourself. “It creates alignment and knowing each other better, connecting, planning and understanding on many issues,” she adds. She notes that it’s essential to continually submit to God, nurture and build your marriage around him.

“God’s plan is good and perfect,” she notes. Eunice explains that understanding each other’s differences is what makes marriage beautiful and special.

“Avoid trying to make your partner like you; that only creates pain and discomfort,” she says. She urges couples to look closely at communication, sex and money and improve daily. “They are similar to the biblical faith, hope and love; they are the lifeblood of marriage,” she shares.

Simon and Gloria Mugisha

The couple have been married for two and a half years, tying the knot in December 2021 amid the Covid-19 pandemic.

“Marriage is God’s ordained and when we allow it to take center stage, it will surely carry you through all the waves and turbulences that warm your heart,” Gloria says. She adds that prayer should not be an option, but a necessity.

“The couple that prays together stays together,” he explains. Simon advises newlyweds to stay in touch. “When a couple communicates, the threads that hold their relationship together remain solid, even if it seems like a difficult conversation. It’s good to smooth out the things that each partner feels are affecting them, and the partners will appreciate that and start working on it,” he notes.

She explains that appreciation is another element of a relationship that plays a huge role in keeping it locked in.

“Thanking your spouse makes him or her feel appreciated and always want to do the best for you,” she notes.

Angelina and Dickens Murorwa

The Murorwas have been married for six years now. They believe that effective communication is one of the pillars of a harmonious and successful marriage.

“Early in our marriage, we exchanged information frequently, but we discovered that there were often misunderstandings,” Dickens says. He realized that effective communication is not just about what is said, but also about what is understood. “Being clear and specific is key; avoiding ambiguous language helps ensure that the message is received and interpreted accurately,” he says.

Dickens argues that active listening is essential to meaningful communication. “It involves fully concentrating, understanding, responding, and remembering what is being said,” he notes. Dickens explains that a lack of active listening not only hinders effective communication, but also makes the spouse feel unheard and unappreciated.

“It’s important to show that you’re committed and that you value what your partner says,” she notes. Angelina says that when your spouse says something you don’t understand, it’s better to ask for clarification than to assume.

“Paraphrasing and reflecting on what was said can be an effective way to make sure it was understood correctly so that you can respond appropriately,” she explains, noting that recognizing that the couple is a team helps couples approach challenges as a united front.

“It’s not you versus your partner, but the two of you standing up for any issues that come up. Maintaining that perspective fosters love and mutual respect,” Angelina explains.