Get third place, live close to your buddies, and discover other friendship lessons we learned from Friends

TV series Friends is celebrating a major milestone this year: The NBC sitcom about a group of friends who grapple with life, love and everything in between officially turns 30 on September 22. (At this point, Joey Tribbiani starts crying.)

The show’s enduring legacy isn’t just based on the actors who became household names, or even its iconic scenes (not to mention the “We were on a break!” debate). For many fans of the show, it’s the special bond these six friends share that keeps them watching the series (now available on Max) again and again.

It should come as no surprise that the group of friends consisting of Monica (Courteney Cox), Phoebe (Lisa Kudrow), Rachel (Jennifer Aniston), Joey (Matt LeBlanc), Chandler (Matthew Perry), and Ross (David Schwimmer) are so ambitious — there’s plenty of research to show what these fictional friends did right.

Find a third place

Characters on Friends regularly hang out together at Central Perk, a coffee shop that could be considered their “third place.” Sociologist Ray Oldenburg first used the term to describe a space outside of home or work—such as a coffee shop, bar, health club, etc.—that encourages socialization. Spending time in these places can make you feel more connected to your community.

Friendship educator and hostess Friend forward podcast Danielle Jackson tells Yahoo Life that her clients regularly tell her they want to have a group of friends like the ones on the show. She notes that having a designated space that is “purely recreational and communal” to spend time together, like they do in Friendsis important because it “continuously sets the tone for sharing ideas and enjoying each other’s company,” which can lead to “deeper friendships.”

Unfortunately, today’s world is seeing a decline in these third places—partly, Jackson says, because of the convenience economy. Instead of going to the library to pick up a new book, you can download it to your Kindle or have dinner delivered instead of going out. While these things can save us time, skipping third places can ultimately make us more isolated from other people, and therefore more lonely. As Jackson notes, “It’s important to have spaces like a coffee shop to get us out of the house so we can have unexpected moments with strangers and (spend time with) friends.”

Build real connections with people you see often

Colleen Marshall, a licensed marriage and family therapist and the chief clinical officer at the therapy group Two Chairs, tells Yahoo Life that research shows that you’re more likely to bond with people you see often and spend more time with—even if you don’t have much in common overall. That’s why people can bond more with their college roommate than with someone on a different floor of their dorm, even if they have a lot more in common.

Characters on Friends they aren’t just drawn together because of their shared interests. In fact, they’re all quite different—just look at the polar opposites of Phoebe and Ross. However, because these friends see each other often, partly because of their status as roommates or neighbors, they’ve grown closer and closer over time.

“Having people around is definitely good for social connection,” Marshall says. “And we know from research on social connection that it’s crucial for our mental health.”

You can apply this principle to your life by striking up conversations with people you see regularly—for example, your neighbor across the hall or the mom you stand next to every day when you pick up your kids from school.

Don’t be afraid to be sensitive

Characters on Friends They aren’t afraid to show their emotions after a bad breakup or ask for advice on a difficult workplace situation. That’s critical to cultivating deeper connections, Jackson says.

“One of the goals of friendship is to find people who see us — who understand us, who can feel comfortable and be themselves,” Jackson explains.

But you can’t get to that comfortable place in friendship without first taking some “social risks,” he says. Friendsthe buddies see each other at their lowest moments—like when Monica gets fired from her job or Ross goes through (yet another) divorce after saying the wrong name at the altar. They know they can count on each other, even in the darkest of times. (There’s a reason their theme song is “I’ll Be There for You” by The Rembrandts.)

“To be able to show up authentically, you have to show up vulnerable—which means taking risks about how I might be perceived, knowing that you might look at me differently after I say it, or that I might seem weak or uncool or incompetent,” Jackson says. “That’s required in any deep friendship.”

Share your life with your friends

Friends Friends they don’t base all of their social interactions around typical friendship activities, like going out for dinner or drinks. Instead, they spend most of their time running errands together and combining things they already have to do (like going to the bank) with spending time together.

According to Marshall, this gives us a boost of happiness because it gives us the opportunity to share positive experiences with another person. “You might have a funny event at the grocery store, and now you’re sharing it with a friend,” he explains.

This can ultimately lead to spending more time with friends. Jackson says one of the things she hears most often from adults is that they don’t have time to spend with friends because of responsibilities like work or raising children. “When we’re isolated or don’t have friends around, spending time with friends feels like something separate to do,” she says. “It becomes something you do on the weekend or something you make time for when you can drive 30 minutes to see them.”

Jackson says it’s important to change the way we view spending time with friends, and separate it from the idea that spending time together has to be part of “celebratory, occasional, long get-togethers.” Instead of meeting up with friends for a long brunch that you might only be able to attend a few times a year, do what Friends characters do this and incorporate social time into their daily schedule—whether it’s heading to Costco or taking a walk for exercise.