Is it worth sending nude photos? The trust, risk and intimacy behind sharing explicit photos

As a heterosexual Kenyan woman who is attracted to men and who dates and has sex with men, the idea of ​​sending intimate photos to a romantic partner has always seemed foreign, and perhaps even taboo to 24-year-old Anyango.

Today, she lives in a long-distance relationship, exchanging naughty photos at least once every two days, and sometimes even twice a day – especially during afternoon lunch breaks at work.

Since her relationship is limited to the unimaginative interface of WhatsApp and Telegram 75% of the time, sending ‘nudes’ is not just an option for two people who trust each other completely and have a very high libido. Living somewhere between the first and second levels of Maslow’s hierarchy of needs has become a necessity.

In the digital age, where smartphones are present and intimate contacts are often made through screens, the practice of sending nude photos is becoming more and more common. But what drives this behavior and what are its consequences?

Dr. Joachim Osur, professor of sexual and reproductive health, sheds light on the fundamental aspects of human intimacy that contribute to this trend.

“When people talk about intimacy, they mostly think about sex,” she explains. “But intimacy and sex involve pleasure, and people can derive pleasure from seeing, hearing, touching and feeling. Part of sex is what you see.”

This visual element of sexual pleasure plays a key role in understanding why people send nude photos.

Dr. Osur emphasizes that men, especially, are highly visual creatures. “When they see photos of their naked partner, they feel good,” she notes.

This is consistent with theories in evolutionary psychology suggesting that visual stimuli play a more significant role in sexual arousal in men compared to women.

A 2019 study published in the Journal of Sex Research identified several key causes: flirting and sexual attraction, providing attention or affirmation, maintaining intimacy in long-distance relationships, sexual experimentation and exploration, responding to pressure or coercion Dr. Catherine Githaka, relationship expert , notes: “For many people, sharing nude photos is a form of sexual self-expression and a way to feel desired. It can increase your self-esteem and strengthen your sense of bond with your partner.

However, the psychology behind sending nudes isn’t always positive. Doctor Osur warns

“The line between love and hate is thin. This sensitivity can be betrayed.”

This potential for betrayal introduces an element of risk that contributes to the complex emotions associated with the practice.

Interestingly, the frequency of sending nudes varies depending on the generation. A 2023 study by the Pew Research Center found that: 48 percent of Gen Z adults (ages 18-26) have sent nude or pornographic photos, 37 percent of millennials (ages 27-42) have engaged in such behavior , 21 percent of Gen Xers (ages 43-58) reported sending nudes, while only 7 percent of baby boomers (ages 59-77) sent such photos.

These statistics highlight a clear generational divide, with younger adults more likely to share intimate photos.

“Growing up in a digital world, Gen Z and millennials often view sharing nudity as a normal part of modern dating and relationships,” says Dr. Githaka.

The dynamics of sending and receiving nudes vary greatly depending on gender. A study published in the Archives of Sexual Behavior in 2022 found that 73 percent of women reported receiving unsolicited nude photos from men.

Only 11 percent of men reported receiving unwanted nude photos from women, while 82 percent of women rated unwanted nude photos negatively and 51 percent of men rated them positively.

These findings highlight the stark contrast in how men and women perceive and experience the exchange of nude photos.

Dr. Osur notes: “When a guy sends a picture of his penis, many women feel disgusted by it. They prefer to meet them in person. But men often appreciate seeing a woman’s body parts in photos.”

This discrepancy concerns the types of photos shared. Women are more likely to send partial nudes that focus on their breasts or buttocks, while men tend to send full-face photos or those that focus on their genitals.

“This difference may reflect societal beauty standards and the objectification of women’s bodies, as well as different patterns of sexual arousal between the sexes,” explains Dr. Githaka.

While sharing nudity can be a positive and consensual experience, it also has a dark undercurrent. Revenge porn – the sharing of intimate images without consent – has become a serious problem.

The Cyber ​​Civil Rights Initiative reports that one in 12 adults has been the victim of revenge porn or threats to share intimate photos of themselves.

A sexologist warns: “People have committed suicide because their photos were shared. If everyone knows the most private part of your body, how can you walk in public again?”

The psychological effects of such betrayals can be devastating and long-lasting.

Moreover, the pressure to send nudes, especially to young women, is a growing problem.

A 2022 study in the Journal of Adolescent Health found that 40 percent of teenage girls reported feeling pressured to send nude photos.

The decision to send nude photos often comes with a mixture of excitement and anxiety. Billy, a 34-year-old millennial, says, “I’ve asked for nudes and sent them, but I’ve never seen the need for it if we’re together.”

Hillary, a 23-year-old Gen Zer, admits: “I was willing to send a few explicit photos, but I wasn’t completely naked.”

The potential for regret seems high. A study published in the Journal of Adolescent Health found that 15 percent of teenagers who sent nude photos reported feeling regret afterward.

Dr. Osur emphasizes the importance of trust and boundaries.

“Before you start sharing your photos and being overly sensitive to others, make sure they are the right people to go this far with.”

The digital nature of nude photos poses serious privacy risks. After sending the image, the sender loses control over its distribution. Dr. Osur advises: “It’s important to talk openly about these issues. If I ever share nude photos of myself, what are our limits? Who is going to see this?”

Legal considerations also come into play. Many jurisdictions have laws prohibiting revenge pornography and the non-consensual sharing of intimate images.

For example, Kenya’s Computer Misuse and Cybercrimes Act criminalizes the act of unlawful dissemination of indecent or intimate images under Section 37.

“Article 37 of the Act states that a person who transmits, publishes or disseminates, including making a digital image available for distribution or downloading via a telecommunications network or in any other way of transmitting data to a computer, an intimate or indecent image of another person,” the Act reads. .

The Act further provides that if a person commits an offense and is liable, he shall be liable to a fine not exceeding Sh200,000 or imprisonment for a term not exceeding two years or both.

However, enforcement can be challenging and damages often occur before legal action is taken.

Caro, a 28-year-old millennial, says, “I never felt obligated to send nudes because he never asked for it, and I was never intrigued by the possibility of sending them. Once you upload your nudes, the security of third parties is never guaranteed. For security and privacy reasons, I choose not to engage in this practice.

Despite the risks, many couples find that sharing intimate photos improves their relationship.

“It fills the gap in intimacy that distance creates. Even if you are in different homes in Nairobi and cannot see or touch each other, there is a gap that images fill,” explains Dr. Osur.

Especially for long-distance couples, sharing nude can help maintain sexual connection and emotional intimacy.

A 2021 study in the Journal of Sex and Marital Therapy found that couples who had sex (including sharing nude photos) reported higher relationship satisfaction and sexual satisfaction compared to couples who didn’t.

Ian, 42, a Gen Xer, says: “Sometimes it’s just a sign of mutual trust. When you send me yours, it’s because you know I won’t hurt your feelings. But you can’t just share with anyone. It’s very intimate.”

He says Marie, 23, has never sent her nudes to anyone.

“Lately, I’ve been asking guys for mine, and they usually agree.”

Her approach takes an unexpected turn: “I actually source images online and send them instead. It’s amazing how often men can’t tell the difference, even if they’ve seen the original.”

Interestingly, Marie says, “I’m more attracted to men who don’t ask for nude photos. It’s refreshing and shows a different kind of respect.”