Woman’s Reason for Walking Out of Her Boyfriend’s Family Dinner Got Praised

The internet has come out in support of a woman who walked out of a family dinner hosted by her boyfriend after he ridiculed her for cooking in front of him.

A 26-year-old woman (u/WhisperingOceans3) decided to leave after her boyfriend publicly criticized her cooking, leaving her feeling embarrassed and hurt. Sharing her experience on Reddit’s “Am I The A******?” (AITA) forum, which received 13,000 upvotes, the woman sparked a conversation about respect, emotional boundaries, and family dynamics.

According to the original author of the post (OP), her 28-year-old boyfriend made a hurtful comment about her lasagna before they even got to his parents’ house, suggesting that she could “learn” from his mother’s cooking. She tried to ignore it, not wanting to start a fight before the meal. However, things escalated during a family dinner.

“We get to his parents and as you would expect, his mom’s lasagna is the star of the meal. Everyone raves about it and of course my boyfriend chimes in with, ‘Oh my gosh, that’s real lasagna. OP tried to make it once, but let’s be honest, there’s a reason we’re all here eating my mom’s lasagna tonight,'” she wrote.

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While his family laughed, he continued to joke, accusing her of burning the sauce and joking that lasagna should be left to the “experts.” Embarrassed, the OP smiled through the remarks, but her boyfriend’s relentless comments began to wear on her.

“I felt like he was bringing me down, especially in front of my family, who I was constantly trying to impress,” she wrote. She then excused herself and went to sit in her car, where her boyfriend followed her, confused by her reaction. When she expressed her pain, he accused her of overreacting.

“I told him if he thought embarrassing me in front of his family was funny, maybe he should date a cooking mom,” she said. Her comment angered him, and they’ve barely spoken since, with him expecting an apology. But she thinks he should apologize first, asking Reddit if leaving was the right decision.

Experts weigh in

Rachel Goldberg, a licensed marriage and family therapist in Los Angeles, thinks this situation falls into a gray area — not because the boyfriend was insensitive, but because he likely didn’t consider how the family dynamics affected his behavior.

As the family joker, he may feel like he’s making his mom laugh, or there may be a deeper dynamic where his mom feels left out while he has a girlfriend,” Goldberg said. Newsweek“It may seem normal to him, even as a way to show respect to his mother, but to his girlfriend — and many others — the teasing is hurtful.”

Goldberg emphasized that communication is key. The boy needs to consider how his actions were hurtful from an outside perspective and apologize. “A conversation in which he tries to see things from her perspective — perhaps imagining himself feeling inferior in front of her family — could prevent future misunderstandings.”

Dr. Raquel Martin, a licensed clinical psychologist at the University of Tennessee, said the situation could be a sign of psychological abuse.

“As a psychologist, I would say that’s not an exaggeration, because it’s an indicator of emotional abuse. Abusive relationships often involve emotional or physical abuse, and emotional abuse is a way in which someone tries to hurt or control another person. This can be achieved by undermining, shaming, blaming, embarrassing, manipulating, or criticizing the victim,” said Dr. Martin Newsweek.

She added that signs of psychological abuse include humiliation, lack of respect or shouting at someone.

Perpetrators of violence seek to weaken their victims by rejecting them and refusing to take into account their feelings, needs and desires.

“Toxic people may also try to isolate you from friends or family by making you feel guilty, forcing you to stay home, constantly accusing you of cheating, or trying to monitor your digital activity. It doesn’t just have to be a romantic relationship. It can also be a relationship with a friend or family member,” she said.

Reddit Reactions

Reddit users were quick to support OP’s decision to leave, calling the boyfriend’s behavior unacceptable.

“Stop cooking for this asshole. NTA (not an asshole),” one user commented.

Another agreed, saying: “Your partner is supposed to lift you up, not tear you down. He purposely hurt your feelings to be the center of attention. That’s emotional abuse. GET RID OF THIS GARBAGE. NTA.”

“Get rid of that mama’s boy like a bad habit,” chimed in a third.

What did she do next?

The author of the post later shared how she dealt with the situation with her partner and thanked the community for their advice.

She decided to sit down with her boyfriend and have an honest conversation, admitting that she was very hurt by his comments and the comparisons he made to her, including to his mother.

“I love cooking and put a lot of effort into it, so when I heard her constantly mention her mom’s lasagna, I felt like she was saying mine wasn’t good enough.

“He seemed genuinely surprised and said he didn’t realize how much it upset me. He thought he was just joking, but I knew he wasn’t serious.”

The author of the post told him that he could accept the joke, but this time she felt humiliated because it happened in front of his entire family.

“He immediately apologized and said he would stop comparing. I could tell he was genuinely sorry, which made me feel better,” she wrote.

She, in turn, apologized to his family for leaving, and they were very understanding; the boy’s mother even said she would love to try her lasagna.

“Everything has been better since then. My boyfriend is more considerate in how he talks about my cooking and I feel like we’ve both learned something from that. It’s not perfect, but I hope things are heading in the right direction,” she concluded.

Newsweek We reached out to u/WhisperingOceans3 for comment via Reddit. We were unable to verify the details of the case.

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