Twenty sentences that will maximize your social intelligence

If you’re struggling to connect with others or build healthy relationships, it may be time to look within.

According to personal development coach liveyourimpossible, our social intelligence is integral to supporting these relationships, so when you better understand the best way to interact with your loved ones, your connections will grow.

Here are 20 phrases to help you maximize your social intelligence so you can better connect with others:

1. “To solve a problem quickly, be gentle with the person and tough with the problem.”

Connections are collaborative, but they can quickly be sabotaged when people don’t feel truly loved and supported. Even in the most difficult situations and conflicts, being in partnership means attacking problems together.

The more you are willing to put your ego aside to support others, the more often that energy will return to your life through new connections, friendships and relationships.

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2. “Pretend they were all sent to teach you something.”

Sometimes meeting new people and building new relationships can be equally exciting and overwhelming. However, people with high social intelligence often have a different perspective on relationships and connections.

Every time you come into contact with someone, whether it’s a pleasant experience or not, remind yourself that you can learn something from them. You don’t have to build a long-term relationship with every person you interact with, but you can draw some insights that will strengthen your other connections.

3. If you pause while speaking and maintain eye contact, it will be a sign of confidence.

Research has shown that slowing down speech and maintaining eye contact can help build people’s sense of calm confidence – and it’s a tactic that many people use in their daily lives.

4. “Make people feel important by being seen, heard and remembered.”

Helping other people feel confident, heard and remembered is the key to both fruitful conversations and healthy relationships. The more grace, kindness and empathy we share with others, the more engaged and committed they will be to doing the same for you.

5. “A person’s favorite sound is their name, so remember that.”

Dale Carnegie’s famous quote, “Remember that a person’s name is, to that person, the sweetest and most important sound in any language” has become the mantra of networking and communication experts.

Evoking this kind of response from someone doesn’t have to be difficult, but it can be powerful – so remember people’s names. Whether it’s a friend of a friend or a co-worker, greeting someone by name when you see them again really makes a difference.

6. “Praise in public, criticize in private” – Warren Buffet.

If you complain or criticize yourself in front of new people, you paint a picture for them of who you are and how you deserve to be treated. The same goes for other people. Excessive criticism or insulting others creates a negative first impression.

7. Before giving feedback, make people aware that you support them.

Sometimes, whether you’re self-aware or not, it can be difficult to accept feedback from your peers without immediately assuming it’s coming from a negative space. When sharing your opinion, whether in an intimate relationship or in a workplace conversation, remember to remind your partner that you are on their side.

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8. “Unexpressed expectations are premeditated resentment” – Neil Strauss.

If you don’t tell someone you expect them to do the dishes, finish a project, or pick you up, how can you get angry when they don’t? In some relationships, assuming this type of behavior may make sense, but there is nothing wrong with “too much” communication.

Resentment builds and relationships break down due to lack of communication, so don’t be afraid to say what you want.

9. “The best networking strategy is the strategy of helping others.”

Social intelligence is partly about you and partly about how you understand others. If you constantly ignore other people while trying to work on yourself, chances are you’ll struggle to build an identity that you want to share with the world.

Helping other people grow is part of the process and extremely rewarding if you take a step back to appreciate it.

10. “Loneliness is a silent pandemic; assume that people want to get to know you.

Statistics show that more than half of Americans in the United States report feeling lonely on a daily basis. So no matter how many social media posts you see about laughing couples and glamorous vacations, chances are you’re not the only one feeling alone, isolated and lonely.

Try to remind yourself that “it’s not just you” as you navigate your daily life. You may simply be more motivated to compliment a stranger, ask someone out on a date, or reach out to an old friend, especially if you know they too are struggling with connection and community.

11. “Practice walking first.” Example: Hello, my name is Ahmed.

Practice “being first” in conversations to build your social intelligence. Meeting new people or stepping out of your comfort zone may feel uncomfortable – especially if you’re an introvert – but ultimately you’re fostering connection for more than just yourself.

The more willing you are to open up conversations, the more practice you have in cultivating insightful conversations. Even if the other person is not as engaged in the conversation as you are, every time you leave your home and enter a new environment, you open the door to positive energy.

12. “Build the habit of responding Suchbecause it develops their idea.

Even if you put yourself in new situations to build social intelligence – whether it’s speed dating, a Bumble date with your BFF, or going to a bar alone – there’s a chance you’ll have some uncomfortable conversations.

Taking a “yes and” approach helps alleviate some of this discomfort. Ask people about themselves, coax and coax their answers. People love talking about themselves, and those who are active listeners and truly interested will be friends, colleagues, and partners that others will want to have around.

13. “Avoid complaining and gossiping (no one likes to hear that).”

Unless you’re at home with a close friend or indulging in a much-needed blow-out session, there’s no reason to add unnecessary drama to the conversation.

Sometimes people even build entire relationships based on spreading rumors. Set a better tone in your relationship to make a complaint, share and discuss it when necessary.

14. “Storytelling is a superpower.”

Be an active listener, empathize with other people’s stories, and refer to things your interlocutor has already said – this is the key to storytelling in discussions.

Storytelling can be learned, so don’t be afraid to willingly put yourself in danger in certain situations.

15. “Every dog has its day because dogs are friendly (there is a lesson there).”

Everyone has a chance for happiness and happiness at different points in their lives – simply because they are here. Most things happen for a reason, but some things just happen by accident. Be kind, compassionate and genuinely interested in connecting with others – good karma is powerful.

If you are kind to yourself and give grace to others, your social intelligence is already much better than most people. Kindness is powerful not only in casual conversations, but also in building long-term, healthy relationships.

16. “The quality of your relationships determines the quality of your life” – Esther Perel.

The people who fill your inner circle are a reflection of you. If you constantly complain and gossip with others, this negative energy will seep into your life.

If you’re not willing to cultivate a healthy circle of close friends and family, you’re sabotaging your life’s potential. You are just a reflection of the people around you. Meet and develop relationships with people who truly love you and challenge you to be better.

17. “To uncover your blind spots, build an inner circle that gives you honest feedback.”

Cultivate relationships that push you to dream big, support you through uncomfortable growth, and celebrate your successes—this is how you build social intelligence and a better sense of self-awareness.

18. “Normalize I don’t know anything about it yetas a successful response.

In a culture that seems to thrive on competition, it can be difficult to admit that you’re not an expert in something. Whether it’s great legislation, the latest and greatest sports team, or the state of a historic conflict abroad, in most cases it’s okay to not know something, but it can be embarrassing to admit it.

Having enough self-confidence to admit that you don’t know something, or even nothing, about a topic is empowering. You open up a space to learn and connect with others.

19. “Record and study your speech like an athlete watching his video.”

Invest in a dream journal. Launch a new notes app where you can collect great contacts, conversations or summaries from debates with your friends. The better you understand how you speak and communicate ideas, the higher your social intelligence.

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20. “Great leaders create more leaders, not followers” – Roy T. Bennett.

Whether it’s work or raising children, sometimes being in a leadership position can be overwhelming.

The best people lead others and help them grow. They don’t try to insecurely foster a sense of superiority or power by putting other people down.

Ultimately, people with high social intelligence know themselves well and respond to the world around them with kindness, compassion and love, not greed, insecurity and resentment.

Zayda Slabbekoorn is a news and entertainment writer at YourTango focusing on health and wellness, social policy and human interest stories.