A man tells his wife he “doesn’t need” her on their wedding night – his reason is perfect

A woman from Texas talked about an important moment that happened on her wedding night.

In June, 34-year-old Nika Diwa shared on her Instagram that she had experienced trauma and harassment resulting from past relationships with men for six years.

On her wedding anniversary, the Diwa explained in a video that before she met her husband, Emeka Ihedigbo (whom she describes as her “first healthy relationship”), she didn’t know what she was doing.

“After years of trauma and harassment from men, I had to completely reprogram my mind and change my perspective on myself and the way I view relationships,” said Diwa Newsweek.

The 34-year-old admitted she was “scared” and felt stuck in a cycle of fear and self-doubt. On their wedding night, she told her husband, “you need me,” and his reaction was not typical.

She recalled how he turned the tables and said, “No, I don’t need you.” The statement, initially sounding harsh, then changed and took on a deeper meaning.

Ihedigbo continued, “That is why I can stand here and love you through this. Whatever you think about yourself is a lie.”

The diva said Newsweek that she was initially shocked by her husband’s statement, but after processing it, she realized that when she reached the point where she could stand on her own as an individual, that was when she was the healthiest version of herself.

“I realized that I don’t need anyone to be fulfilled and valuable. I am enough as I am. All alone. “The blessing of loving someone else is just a bonus,” she said.

The diva calls her husband’s announcement “the ultimate flexibility,” according to an Instagram text overlay that has racked up more than 3 million views since it was uploaded.

Many viewers on Instagram shared their admiration for Ihedigbo’s understanding of Diva’s past trauma, with one commenting that she hopes to have a husband like him one day.

Another Instagram user wrote: “Isn’t it special when two people can do this for each other. Truly love unconditionally. Imagine the healing you can provide for each other. Knowing that you are accepted among such chosen ones.”

The diva continued to highlight her husband’s support on the reel. After stating that he would stand there to recover from the abuse, Ihedigbo said: “Because my worth, my worth, is not in you. That’s why you can say these horrible things to me and I’m going to stand here and love the fear that comes out of you.”

This point seemed most striking among Instagram viewers, as one user commented that his statement “speaks volumes,” while another petitioned him to write a book that other men could read.

Research on traumatic and abusive relationships highlights their prevalence in the United States. According to the National Intimate Partner and Sexual Violence Survey (NISVS) conducted by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), approximately 1 in 4 U.S. women will experience serious physical violence from a partner during their lifetime.

“I am so grateful for the village of friends, therapists and counselors who have helped me on my healing journey,” said Diwa Newsweek.

Anyone looking for help should call the National Domestic Violence Helpline, a free and confidential helpline available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. He can be reached at 1-800-799-7233 or TTY 1-800-787-3224. The hotline also provides information about local resources. More information can be found at thehotline.org.