9 complaints Husbands are tired of listening to their wives

There are a million things that married couples can point out to each other, but that doesn’t mean you should. As wives, we need to keep our husbands under control.

We have the right to yell at them for playing on their cell phones all the time, not cutting their toes and nails, and going to dinner in a wrinkled shirt. But it’s not worth wasting your breath on other topics.

Here are 9 complaints that husbands are tired of hearing from their wives:

1. His obsession with sports television

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Instead of commenting that your husband is always sitting in front of the TV during baseball, football, hockey, or any other sport season, just accept the fact that he will watch every event, bet money on the winner behind your back, and probably yell at you. screen while doing this.

It’s a man thing. We will never understand. Just like he will never understand why you can’t miss any episode of your show.

A 2015 Rutgers University study examining why husbands may feel frustrated by their wives’ complaints often points to factors such as gendered communication styles, perceived expectations for problem solving, feeling criticized or not heard, stress related to with work and mismatch in interpersonal relationships. how couples deal with conflict, with wives more willing to express concerns. In contrast, husbands may try to quickly “fix” problems.

2. Your body image

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Every husband has heard at least once how much his wife thinks she is fat, hates her hair, etc. For him, you are a goddess. He doesn’t notice the few extra pounds you may have gained or the fact that your roots are overgrown. Don’t be so hard on yourself.

3. His lack of romance

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Your husband loves you. Yes. He just doesn’t always know how to show it. Remember that while you are watching romantic comedies, he is watching sports.

He needs someone to teach him how to keep the sparks alive. Start by leaving him little love notes around the house and maybe he will follow your lead.

Couples will always complain about each other. Unfortunately, instead of expressing their complaints, they criticize each other. Uncontrolled criticism leads to contempt, defensiveness and a stone wall. Dr. John Gottman of the Gottman Institute has refined the skill of effective complaining into a simple, three-part formula. The formula includes expressing your feelings, discussing a specific situation and verbalizing a positive need.

4. His working hours

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We’re sure he’d rather stay at home with his legs stretched out on the couch and a beer in his hand, as much as you’d like him to be home, but some jobs are more demanding than others. As long as he doesn’t come in every day at 11 p.m., don’t bother him about spending long hours at the office.

However, if this happens, check his shirt collars for lipstick and perfume to be sure. And remember, you enjoy shopping with that hard-earned cash.

5. Your PMS

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Guys are usually very compassionate, but they complain too much and they will start to feel guilty or inadequate. Always focusing on the negative (even when it’s justified) may cause others to reject you.

Instead, try to focus on solutions rather than problems. A 2017 study from Edith Coward University and the University of Western Australia found that instead of simply making accusations, such as “You did” this or that, use “I feel” statements to take the conversation into other territory. For example, saying, “I feel ignored when you don’t listen to me” is likely to be more effective at getting your partner’s attention than saying, “You never listen.”

6. His guidance

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Just place your foot on the imaginary brake pedal in the passenger seat and stay silent. It won’t change your driving style just because you’re in the car. If he’s not constantly getting stopped, fined or ticketed, leave it alone.

7. The type of music he plays

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Not all couples like the same music genres. Create a “safe” playlist of your favorite songs and play it while you’re in the car together.

According to a 2023 study that examined the causes and effectiveness of marriage counseling, women are more likely than their male partners to worry about intimacy, child-rearing and jealousy. Both men and women likely cite a lack of emotional intimacy, lack of communication, loss of trust, and stress outside the relationship as factors that led them to seek marriage counseling.

8. Keeping the house clean

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What if there is still dried food on the edges of the dishes? At least he tried to help you and tried to wash them. And if the house is not vacuumed or the furniture is a little dusty, you will survive. It can wait another day. Everyone is so busy these days that sometimes you just need to put aside your responsibilities and enjoy time with your family.

9. His parents

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He probably feels the same way about you. Do you want all your conversations to revolve around your mother-in-law? I didn’t think so.

Harvard University research shows that to keep love alive, couples should focus on open communication and showing gratitude to their partner. Hubby can be happy living a quiet life by following a routine. But there are two people in the relationship, and the wife wants interaction, something life-giving: perhaps a shared hobby such as dancing, pickleball, or a charity where they can work together.

Joelle Speranza is an author, lifestyle writer and columnist who has been published on Oprah Daily, Insider, HuffPost, MindBodyGreen, Today.com Parenting Community, LittleThings and more.